PLAYER BLURBS.
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No Blurb Submitted As Yet.
Contact Hazaar at jhenson@calpoly.edu
*sigh* Here I go again it seems - hmm... "me" - a new clone of me would be a
more correct description, I reckon... Anyway, this world seems extremely
familiar - I get much more than a deja vu feeling from these vibrations, so I
guess quite a few of my earlier "mes" must have been here before...
Well, no point in grumbling over the mistake of that original Alodar The Still
Uncloned Complete Moron {Hmm, I guess I had better register that trademark at
the CMAA - ie. the Completely Meaningless Acronyms Association - before someone
else does, or my uncloned predecessor will have to do with a not sufficiently
unflattering title...} - he shouldn't have fiddled with a 'clone self' spell
until he knew it was totally safe... Safe - hmm... I think it is safe to
paraphrase something I - or rather one of my direct cloning prescendants - seem
to have picked up somewhere; "It is not safe to fiddle with a clone self spell
even when it is safe to do so!" Hmm, that is a good one - I had better write it
up (or down?) in my TUM (Totally Useless Metaphors) notebook! TUM, that is, not
TYM :)
TYM :) ? Now THAT rings a Bell, said Graham! {That is one for my TTPWYSPPPF
notebook - Totally Terrible Puns Which You Should Pay Pun Penalty For -
speaking of which even the acronym is so totally terrible that neither the CMAA
nor even the CIASS - Criminally Incompetent Acronyms Secret Society - wanted
to register such a trademark...}
Well at least I now have something to go on - TYM :) must have something to do
with this world - could it be the name of one of its provinces or maybe of the
whole world? Ahh, here comes someone I can ask...
-Hi fella, could you tell me if this world is perchance called TYM :) or maybe
this province?
-WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT YOU BASTARD?? I DON'T UNDERSTAND ANYTHING OF IT SO
IT MUST BE AN INSULT - AND WE OGRES DON'T TAKE LIGHTLY TO INSULTS! PREPARE
YOURSELF FOR BEING RESHAPED INTO A MEATBALL {charging wildly}
-All I did was ask a polite question - nothing to get so upset about, you
ignorant little, err.. HUGE, creature! Good for you that I am in a playful
rather than angry mood just now or I'd turned you into a lettuce and tossed
you to the rabbit over there, but now - let me see... {deftly dodging 40 wild
charges while thinking deeply} ... ahh, yes!! *chuckle* {deftly dodging 2 more
charges while chuckling merrily} - ZAP!!!
Oh boy, that was a great one - I have to immediately submit this to the WOWBPJC
(War Of Wizards Best Practical Jokes Contest) and I might even collect a prize
for this priceless specimen !
-OK, you ignorant ogre, now you see what happens when you try to mess with
Alodar the cloned Apprentice when he is in a good mood... IF I now turn you
back into your original self [not that I would call that an improvement] you'd
better behave yourself or I might just decide to change into an angry mood -
got that? {The VERY strange-looking creature sitting in front of Alodar nods
VERY eagerly - in fact, even verier than that} OK then - but I should at least
take a picture of this creation for the WOWBPJC before zapping him back
{producing a camera from out of nowhere} *click!* !!!PAZ
-THANK YOU, OH MIGHTY WIZARD!
-Ouch - my ears; hang on a second or 42 while I produce some earplugs from out
of nowhere... {producing a pair of earplugs from out of nowhere}
-Earplugs - me not know that either, so you must have insulted me again, but
you too strong a wizard for me... Me promise not to charge you again! And
besides, we really need a new wizard - our previous one got himself reshaped
into a meatball after making such an insulting comment that we for a moment
forgot about his powers and attacked him, the whole ogre population of
Sawtooth Mountain, yes we did indeed!
-Ehh, not that it is really my business, but what was the monstrous insult he
made?
-HE END A SENTENCE WITH THE WORD "PLEASE" !! No ogre can take an insult like
that, no sir!
-OK - I'll try to end my sentences with the word 'plumpudding' instead then if
that makes you happier... But now, I need a lot of information, and this
discussion has taken a lot of time already! So go ahead and tell me all about
this world, ple...umpudding!
-As you command, wizard... ?!
-Alodar the Apprentice is the name, fella!
-Thank you, wizard Alodar! If we just walk in that direction I can fill you in
on the situation in our world...
{Somewhat later - well, to be perfectly honest "somewhat" later would be a more
apt description of the time passed...}
-Thank you for the briefing, fella! So let's see if I got it right - this world
is called Crynn, it is set in a universe called War of Wizards, and this is an
ogre province called Sawtooth?! [Hmm, that still leaves TYM :) to be accounted
for, but I'll have to deal with that later...]
-Yes, mighty wizard, that is correct!
-OK fella - dismissed! Go tell your fellow ogres that Alodar the Apprentice now
occupies your chair of wizardry - and in case some of them would get the idea
of reshaping me into a meatball I'm going to post this photograph on the door
to show what happens to ogres meatballing me when I am in a GOOD mood...
So this is their magic college - quite a sizable building taking into account
the *chuckle* "size" of their brains... Hmm, figure that when working with
these guys I have to rely on quantity rather than quality *sigh*... Well, time
for Alodar the cloned Apprentice to get to work again - seems I always find
myself in a chair of wizardry within a day or so after each cloning; wonder if
there is some hidden pattern in these seemingly random occurrences... ?!
Well, never mind, here we seem to have the library... Now where do I start -
maybe by finding out the meaning of the reference to TYM :)... The spell
"smiley" looks like a good place to start {casting the spell ":)"}
Ahh, now I see the big picture (not that the ogres themselves could be called
small, though...) - a previous clone of me was also on Crynn, and he was allied
to a wizard called TYM :) and they were both allied to the ogres as well, and
fought the humans on the mainland! Sounds like a reasonable policy on this
world too - these ogres are no good for anything except fighting, that is more
than obvious... And humans are usually polite enough to end every second
sentence with the word "please" so they should provide some ample meatballing
practice for my ogre warriors!
OK, let's see what I can find on these shelves - this title looks promising:
"A Short Introduction to the Foundations of Crynn Magick".
"A short introduction" - that sounds good! I like them short and snappy - wait,
what says the fine print...
"Volume I of XLII"...
*grRr* Looks like this is going to be a long session, and the chair looks quite
uncomfortable - size "O" for ogres, no doubt - I think I will begin by casting
"improve chair comfort" or I might FEEL like a meatball before I'm through with
volume II {casting the spell "improve chair comfort"} - KA-BLAZOOM!! Oh noo,
ple..umpudding!! {Looking at the result in utter disgust} Seems I have a LOT of
work to do on that spell... *sigh* {Dejectedly sitting down on the floor to
work on the spell "improve chair comfort"}
Contact Alodar the Apprentice at rwikman@ra.abo.fi
No Blurb Submitted As Yet.
Contact Shrike at creggec@telusplanet.net
S-s-s-so, you s-s-s-say you want to know what we, the lizardmen of Drakilak are up to? Who wouldn't want to know? This-s-s-s island we live on is-s-s-s too s-s-s-small for us-s-s-s. S-s-s-so, we are letting you know that we intend to expand our holdings-s-s. My name is-s-s Drak' i' lak. It's-s-s-s not only my name, it's-s-s-s a title of honor among my people. I have earned it. We have no great affinity for any of the other rac-c-c-c-es-s of Crynn. We als-s-s-so have no fear of any of the others-s-s. We res-s-s-spect s-s-s-strength and have no us-s-s-se for the weak. S-s-s-s-o, if you are one of the weak, cower in fear. My people or one of our allies-s-s are coming for you. If you fight well, you s-s-s-shall die well, if not... I leave that up to your imaginat-s-s-shun. This-s-s-s is a dark world, and s-s-s-since it is-s-s s-s-s-such, we take delight in knowing that our s-s-s-strength comes-s-s from the power of the dark. We do not honor the lich lords-s-s of the previous-s-s-s times-s-s, neither do we condemn them. We s-s-s-simply acknowledge their s-s-s-superior judgment in choos-s-sing to align thems-s-s-selves-s-s with the power of darkness-ss-ss-ss. I love that word!! In conclus-s-sion, if you would find us-s-s-s a worthy ally, we would be honored to hear from you. If you choos-s-se to condemn us-s-s-s, then I hope that your death will be s-s-s-slow and tortuous-s-s-s. Until next we hear from you, Drak' i' lak of Drakilak (Who s-s-s-says-s-s we lack imaginat-s-s-shun?)
Contact Drak' i' lak at gstruthers@gunder.com
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DERVISH
CENTER MARKET, CASTOR FIELDS. The
speeker of the senate is addressing the people. Yes my people. Economy is the thing, no magic, no armies, no nothing. Don’t you know?. You can not rise armies with no money, you can not research magic or train apprentices with no money, you can not improve your city free. That’s the point money, and that means economy. Therefore I propose we center our life on it more than what we already do. If our life has been always centered on profit and trade now it must be one hundred fold more, if we lived of our neighbours materials we have to cheat them more. Anything, anyway an any method we have to use to achieve it. We have to, we must be the richest nation in this world and through this we will be the empire above kingdoms, the un blemished ones that rule all. I know ew despise magic ways and military methods, but I fear we will have to use them. Being only traders and merchants won’t allow us to rule over others. But never fear, this will be achieved throught he money we earn on trades.
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The
silent figure hidden in the dais behind the speaker smiled
crookedly.
Aeneas left the chief counselor with his speech, now it came the
meaningless part, so he went to the palace to ready new meassures
to
ensure his success. Yes, the fool was doing his job well. Let him
think he
was doing well, he just knew part of the truth. The other in the
council
did not need to know the real ruler of the Dervish empire, no they
should
not know who was he. Prejudices would swell up and the efficiency
would
fall to the levels where it was before his coming. Yes he was a
wizard and
through the fool council head he will rule them all. Magic
compulsion was
a good thing to know, his collegues and friends always thought it
was
discusting, but he knew better, and certainly he had its uses. In
fact he
was the ruler of the Dervishes in a way, but al schemes againt
them and
the failures would be suffered by the chief counselor and the
counci
itslef. Let him be behind the scenes, directing the play with
nobody the
wiser. Yes he must not fail now. Other wizards would know but they
could
do nothing to get him aout of where he already was. Now he had to send the other wizards friendship messages. He wanted them to know he welcomed trade and information exchanges. Let them fight each other, he will remain peacefull. Yes he would send them his magical means of contact Jmaqua@jazzfree.com . Let them know he could read any messages sent here. HE was eager to receive the first messages……….
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Contact Aeneas at jmaqua@jazzfree.com
I am Semblar the Great, lord of the windswept and rugged beauty that is Lachlan Spur. Many have challenged my might, yet all who have made the attempt have perished. To those of you who stand for the right and proper ways of truth and justice for all, know me to be a friend throughout all trials, privations and hardships. Those who choose the darker paths to power will earn only condemnation, decimation and your ultimate destruction.
I call upon all who choose to defend the people from the Lich Lords to contact me, so that we may build an alliance able to withstand the coming onslaught of evil. This can be done through
semblar@blueyonder.co.ukMany have already flocked to the banner of what is good and just. Some have made contact merely through magical communication, whereas others have already had their forces meet up with my brave Highland Warriors, and find out that their reputation for hard partying is not exaggerated! Those who have chosen to ally with the great Highland nation will find that their faith is not misplaced, and will be repaid in full, with interest.
For many years, the hills and dales around the Spur itself have echoed to the laughter of the children and the cries and shouts of the men practising their weaponskills or competing in one of the many games and spectacles that were held. The oncoming days of darkness have dulled the noise and gaiety, but not the spirit of the people. We will prevail through the most demanding of times, and repel any and all invaders who seek to take our lives away. The evil Lich Lords will meet their doom, at the hands of the allied forces of good- as long as we are all steadfast and remain undaunted in the face of fear and terror.
Contact Semblar the Great at danreed@blueyonder.co.uk
No Blurb Submitted As Yet.
Contact Anthalion at Anthalion@geekmail.de
No Blurb Submitted As Yet.
Contact Nicolas at nicolas.depauw@vt4.net
No Blurb Submitted As Yet.
Contact Sirikul at valkrob@mozart.inet.co.th
No Blurb Submitted As Yet.
Contact Mitsushi at wowgreg@yahoo.com
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